Lust:
Don’t even think of about it!
Exo 20:14 / Matt 5:27-32
A man & wife were shopping at a mall, a shapely young woman in a short
dress strolled by. The man’s eyes followed her. Without looking up from what
she was doing, his wife asked "Was it worth the trouble you’re in?”
We live in a morally decaying world. Filled with the
lust of the flesh.
Lust is = a longing (especially for what is forbidden):-desire, lust
(after).
Entertainment
Media is no help regarding morality.
From a study made of 104 leading television writers &
executives they found that
Hollywood’s
views run far from the mainstream of public opinion. (No news)
• 85 % of Americans believe adultery is wrong, 49% of TV writers /executives
do.
• 59 % say a woman has a right to an abortion. Hollywood says 97 % of the
time.
• only 4% have no religious affiliation, 45%
of TV writers & executives have “0”
No
wonder Hollywood keeps promoting moral impurity.
Everything
they put out is self-centered hype. American Idol, Marry your favorite rich-guy,
Avg. Joe. Those contestants are sowing to the wind, and we are all going to reap
God’s whirlwind! Making a mockery of morality.
Social
agendas are attempting to re-define moral purity
• Same-sex marriage became a legal reality in Massachusetts 2004
• Do you know what is quickly replacing “thus saith the Lord” when it
comes to marriage vows and equal
yokes? The concept of family with “Susie Has Two Moms” & “anything
goes if we
really love each other”
A man wrote: "Dear Abby, I am
in love & I am having an affair with 2 different women other than my wife. I
love my wife but I love these other women too. Please tell me what to do, but
don’t give me any that morality stuff." Signed: Too much love for only
1.” Abby’s answer was classic. “Dear Too much love for only 1.The only
difference between humans & animals is morality. Please write a
veterinarian."
The
new definition is = there is no definition, anything goes.
1Jn 2:16
For all that is in
the world, the lust of the flesh, and the lust of the eyes, and the pride of life, is not of the Father, but is of
the world.
There
is a phrase that appears over and over again in the Old Testament: …and every man did what was right in his own
sight….Friends,
this describes a very bleak time in Israel’s history. It’s NOT far from
where we are today.
Douglas
Taylor-Weiss, Minister in Dayton, Ohio, has proposed a new set of 10
Commandments based on his observations of our culture:
1. Thou shalt Have a good
day. 2. Thou shalt Shop.
3. Thou shalt Eliminate pain.
4. Thou shalt Be
up-to-date.
5. Thou shalt
Relax.
6. Thou shalt Express yourself.
7. Thou shalt have a happy
family. 8. Thou shalt Be entertaining.
9. Thou shalt Be
entertained.
10. Thou shalt Buy entertainment."
He forgot 11. Thou shalt Get
in touch with Thy feelings.
That defines the current obsession with self & sex.
The
Lord knows our nature & loves us enough not to leave us that way.
He
knows we take the easy way out. We compromise, instead of obey….
Pro
14:12 There
is a way which seems right to a man, but its end is the way of death
It is easier to get married than to stay married. Today’s world has
become
very permissive. Sex is
everywhere (TV, newspaper, billboard, Internet etc.). Readers Digest did a study
& said more than 50% of all husbands & 35% of all wives have committed
adultery. This happens among Christians too.
I do not want to open old wounds, nor do I want to ignore the Bible says….
“You shall not commit ADULTRY” Exo. 20:14
This
commandment deals with all forms of immorality. What it says in a nutshell, is
that all sexual involvement outside of marriage, is SIN.
Adulterate = to make
inferior, impure, not genuine, etc. by adding a harmful,
less valuable, or prohibited substance
I want to
give you two big categories today:
(1) The prevention to
adultery, (2) The pathway back from adultery.
I.
THE PREVENTION TO ADULTERY
Here are 6 steps on how to prevent adultery/immorality:
1.
Make a commitment to God’s standards.
A) Make a commitment, Regardless of past or
present failures,
only –not before & not outside marriage Adultery/Immorality should never be an option. No
justification for it.
Psa 119:9 How can a young man cleanse his way?
By taking heed
word.
B) Joseph could’ve given in. If he lived today, it
could’ve gone like... “I’m young,
attractive, single, I’m in a foreign country, it’s acceptable in this
society, she’s Ok with
it, I desire it, it might help my career, I’m emotionally scarred, my brothers hate me,
sold me to slavery, mother died when I was young, I’ve had a terrible life, deprived of
love – I DESERVE IT!
C) Nope, Joseph turned & ran. He said, “I will not sin against my God.”
D) There are temptations. Turn & run.
What commitments have you made?
Pro 5:15 “Be faithful to your own wife. Give your love to her alone”
Penny
& I made several commitments to keeping our marriage safe.
1. Make a commitment to God’s
standards.
2. Magnify
the Consequences.
A)
Recognize the devastation caused by sexual sin and take note.
The shame never goes away. The sense of loss is enormous.
Pro
6:26 For by means of a harlot a man is reduced to a crust of
bread; and an
adulteress
will prey upon his precious life.
B) Three reasons to be
faithful to your husband / wife:
1) For Love of Jesus. He
said if you love me keep my commandments
2) Love your wife (or
husband) and kids.
even think of.
3) The judgment of God. Heb 13:4 Marriage is honorable among all, and the bed
undefiled; but fornicators and
adulterers God will judge.
C) Immorality is
selfishness. “It’s all about me”.
1)“Forget how it hurts others, I want” Instead of working to improve your relationship
with your wife/husband you seek another solution.
do what WE SAYS.
2) America is in a mess.
Think about our schools & the morality that
they now battle
pornography, sexual
an after thought
1. Make a commitment to God’s standards,
2. Magnify the consequences,
3.
Maintain Your Marriage.
God said it’s your testimony
A) Keep your marriage
growing to reduce
the temptation of adultery.
1 Cor 7:3 Let the husband render to his wife
the affection due her, and
wife to her husband.
B) His Needs, Her Needs by Dr. Willard Harley give the 5 top needs of most men and the
5 top needs of most women:
DO you
know what His needs and Her needs are.
Find out what your spouse
needs and set out to meet them.
C) When you said, “I Do” you thought your spouse would meet these important needs in
your life. Unfortunately, many feel disappointed and begin to look outside marriage to satisfy
these needs.
D) The physical relationship is one of biggest problems in marriage.
1Cor 7:5 Do not deprive one another except with consent for a time, that you may give
yourselves to fasting and prayer; and come together again so that Satan does not tempt
you because of your lack of
self-control
E) SET some GOALS. become best friends.
Start dating again.
“It can be easy to leave
your spouse. It’s harder if your also best friends.”
Talk together, walk together, be together.
1) Make a commitment to God’s standards,
2) Magnify the consequences,
3) Maintain your marriage:
4.
Manage My (your) Mind
A) Immorality is a process.
There’s no such thing as
a “one night stand.”
You’re not a moral, upright person 1 day & the next day an
adulterer.
Matt 5:27-28 "You have heard that it was
said to those of old, ’You shall not commit
adultery.’ 28 But I say to you that whoever looks at a woman to lust for her has already
committed adultery with her in his
heart.
>Thoughts>Feelings>Actions>Adultery
Jam
1:14-15 But each one is tempted when he is
drawn away by his own desires and
enticed. 15 Then, when desire has conceived, it gives birth to sin; and sin, when it is
full-grown, brings forth death.
B)
Here’s how it goes AND shouldn’t :
#1–Focus on your disappointments, don’t talk
#2–Emotional non-physical involvement (talk about needs
to others )
#3–Physical involvement. Comforting, then hugging, then
more.
Once this happens it’s really
hard to break away. It takes everything you have & God’s
grace.
The passion & power of adultery is strong.
#4–Rationalizing the affair.
“If only my husband/wife met my
needs,
I wouldn’t be doing this.”
“We love each other.” “God loves us no matter what
we
do.”
God will forgive.”
Jer
17:9 "The heart is deceitful above
all things, & desperately wicked;Who can know it?
C) Don’t presuming on God’s grace.
(it’s unmerited favor)
Rom 6:1 “Should we sin that grace may
abound? God forbid!”
How can we who died to sin keep living/making excuses for….
1. Make a commitment to God’s standards 2 Magnify the consequences 3 Maintain your marriage, 4 Manage your mind:
5. Maintain
Proper Relationships
Most
affairs occur with close personal friends, co-workers, neighbors
maintain proper
relationships?7
A)
Don’t listen to marriage problems from the opposite sex.
Everyone has marriage
struggles. Steer them to a counselor/pastor/etc
B) WOMEN,
don’t fish for compliments. Husband’s may not notice you die your
hair
green—don’t look outside
marriage for emotional needs
HUSBANDS, watch what you say to
women, make compliments safe OR say nothing, just
don’t risk being
misunderstood.
C) Avoid
a prolonged stare. Singles flirt, OK, but
not married people.
D) Avoid
a lingering touch. Prolonged touch can send
the wrong signal
A) Be
sure friends are as committed to their marriage as you are.
If there not, YOU’LL know, then, go make new friends….for now!
B) Be careful in the workplace. Everybody looks good at work. Dressed well. Make-up on.
No curlers, best behavior,
etc.
You don’t see them
before they get ready as you do your spouse.
C)
Don’t EVEN go there! Avoid the appearance AND
you’ll miss the temptation (Mostly)
and all but eliminates
opportunity
1Th 5:22
Abstain from all appearance of evil.
II.
THE PATHWAY BACK FROM ADULTERY
There’s always hope if you are willing.
Mar 10:4-9 And they
said, Moses suffered to write a bill of divorcement, and to put her away 5 And
Jesus answered and said unto them, For the hardness of your heart he
wrote you this precept. 6 But
from the beginning of the creation God made them male and
female. 7 For
this cause shall a man leave his father and mother, and cleave to his wife; 8 And
they twain shall be one flesh: so then they are no more twain, but one flesh. 9 What
therefore God hath joined together, let not man put asunder.
Four
steps:
1. Acknowledge
the Sin
See David’s prayer in Psalm
51 when he committed adultery.
2. End
the Relationship Immediately.
Avoid Contact with that Person from now
on.
You can’t be friends after you’ve
become intimate.
No letters, cards, calls, visits. You may need to put
in for a transfer.
1Th 5:22
Abstain
from all appearance of evil.
3. Seek Reconciliation
2Co 5:19
...
God was in Christ, reconciling the
world unto himself, not
imputing their
trespasses unto
them; & hath committed unto us the word of
reconciliation.
After you make things right with God, you must make
things right with
each other. IT TAKES WORK.
4. Intentionally Rebuild Trust—Establish an accountability partner. Take time to listen, and
make sure you respond.
Marriage is a beautiful picture of Christ and the church.
God established the rules. We find peace & joy
following them.
Maybe you realized there are
problems in your marriage.
Maybe your thought life has strayed.
Is there already an emotional attachment outside of
marriage?
You need to give it to God. STOP it now! Maybe you’ve
crossed the line, marriage can be
repaired.
Remember God can do anything.
He can FORGIVE, HEAL and RESTORE
Invitation Hymn: #307 “Just
As I Am”